If you see me riding my bike

Then please hit me with your car.

No, do it, don't even hesitate.  I promise, it won't hurt that much...ok, it will probably hurt a lot, just do it.

Something in my head recently told me it was irresponsible to drive my car to the gym that is 3 blocks away when I could ride my bike/run there.  Of course this comes with the price of pain.

I like to keep in shape, but I've never really biked recreationally before and it's...difficult.

Just on my way to school

-I'm scared of getting hit by cars

-My legs burn like the 7th level of hell since the gym is downhill on the way there and (obviously) uphill on the way back

-My bike is from the late 70's/early 80's and the gears are very touchy and in the middle of the bike underneath the handlebar.  Meaning I wobble like a goon whenever I try to change gears (this is where the getting hit by cars comes into the picture).

-Cars

-I still don't know the hand signals for turning

-FLATTENED BY AN AUTOMOBILE

And running is no better you guys.  I'm going to go against my own word for a sec, bear with me:  Running is worse than getting to school and realizing you forgot to study for a test, you're in the wrong class...and you're naked.  Also a dog bit you on the way to school and then he talked smack about your mom.

Yet, I still go running.

What's wrong with me?  Maybe it's all the preservatives I've been eating this week and they're triggering something that makes me guilty about not exercising.  That or I've been infected with that hippie college virus I hear about.  I almost got out of University clean you guys, why now? I don't have money for a Prius.  Next thing you know I'll be composting all my old food and wearing Tevas with socks.

On that day, you can hit me with your car.


Sidenote:  Ok guys, I have jumped on the Lana Del Rey train many months late, but I'm a little obsessed right now.  Something about her voice is so haunting...