Wai-wait...where am I? How did I get here?
What is this endless space of sarcasm, snarky jokes, and cats just floating around in endless space? The In-ter-net you say?...what? What wizardry is this? I say we find whatever witch created this and burn them! BURN THEM!
...so fortunately I haven't regressed that much in the span of 40 days. Although, I do enjoy a good witch burning in my backyard every now and then. Keeps my crops from failing. I call it "yardwork" *
The first part of my social network cleanse was...interesting. Sweating, vomiting, nausea, hallucinations; I stayed up for days rocking back and forth in my bed whispering things to myself like: "Science cat...where is science cat!" "Must look at cartoons with witty puns! Please, just one!" "I wonder what day it is..." (I actually just say that one all the time). I would accost people on the street asking them for just a glimpse of their twitter feed or if they even had one. Just one tweet, I'd be good after one, I promised. Rejected by society, I just ran home to fill the void in my soul with honey bunches of oats.
I'm pretty sure I saw cats and unicorns climbing around my room and shooting lasers out of their eyes...wait, that's a normal Tuesday night.
After laying in my own filth for a couple of days, the shuddering stopped and I could see straight again. I had done it, I had distanced myself from my dealer and come out on the other side scarred, but alive.
I kid, I kid. Being completely honest in a completely non-sarcastic tone (hard for me, I know), turning my back on social networking was altogether a rather easy and good experience. The first couple days I did almost slip up a couple times when I'd go into autopilot and hop down onto my lappy, start ticking away a website, and then scream and throw my computer onto the floor into a million pieces like it was Shelob.** But after that, I realized it was something that didn't bother me. Only occasionally in the back of my mind some thought would arise as to "what was happenin'" but I easily could remind myself I was alive without it.
I was still doing well in school (if not better), reading more books than I had before (to keep up with my New Years goal), making real meals, going outside and seeing that bright round thing in the sky, and sitting in the same clothes I had worn the day before listening to Rihanna full blast. My mind was even a little less cluttered with useless info. Dang, I really need to get on my laundry.
What I'll say (as I've also stated in various ways before) is that this is my opinion in the matter of what I learned:
Social networking, ie: Facebook, twitter, tumblr, etc. are not the evil things themselves. The misuse and overuse of them is the detrimental thing in our society (our society being the typical American teenager/young adult). Instead of ruling our lives, they should only be a supplement to how we are living. Like nutrition, you can't live only off of vitamins and candy, eventually you have to eat something with sustenance. I'm really glad I participated in Lent and would even go as far as to recommend it to you, dear reader, to participate in some year if you feel the need to get a new perspective.
So go slaughter and grill that metaphorical cow, climb that real mountain, and make yourself a nice thick chocolate milkshake. No really, make a milkshake, you look like you could use one.
Now if you'll excuse me, I have some yardwork to do...
Oh yes, I'll see about putting up the Lent diaries at all since looking at them now, I don't know how I feel about them. We'll see.
*That was for you (you know how you are. You stole my milk).
**Totally making an LOTR reference in case you weren't aware.
Monday, April 9, 2012
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Lent 2012
The time has come again this year that a large population of the world participates in the practice that is Lent. In a quick summary: Lent is a period of 40 days that begins on Ash Wednesday where one is to give up something whether it be a physical thing or a practice.* I honestly didn't know that much about Lent so I Googled it and came up with a nice history on this website.
"But wait," you say, "you aren't Catholic." Yes, I'm aware of the fact that I'm not practicing the religion that normally practices Lent, but it doesn't mean I cannot participate. In my opinion, it is good for every person to practice some self-control and also to see what we can live without since we live in a world of excess. Generally, it's something that anyone can do if they think it will benefit them.
This will be the first time that I've ever attempted a 40 day fast from anything and I really am excited to see what I can accomplish or discover about myself.
What is it that I'm going to give up you ask? This may not be a problem for some people, but seeing as how I grew up in a generation where my head is basically Siamese with a computer, I decided to give up social-networks. I'll be honest, I spend large chunks of time browsing the web and lol'ing at witty memes (I hope none of that made any sense), so now I need to find a better way to use this time. What I'm hoping for is that I'll use it for homework, studying, and exercising.
Unfortunately, this blog counts as a social network so it's going to have to hibernate with the others while I distance myself from the interweb and step into some sunlight (ahhhh, it burns!). Instead of writing down stories/thoughts about Lent and other things here, I'll be writing them down on my lappy or in my notebook, and later (using the magic copy/paste button) to put them on here. One thing I'll be diligent about is not trying to find loopholes. This is all or nothing guys.**
See you all in 40 days (not counting Sundays).
*This isn't all Lent is about, but it's one of the main things. There's a lot of fasting and special days. Go read up if you'd really like to know.
**I'm still going to be using e-mail since it's a necessity currently and it really isn't a social network anyways. Also, the internet isn't off limits, just things like Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, etc.
"But wait," you say, "you aren't Catholic." Yes, I'm aware of the fact that I'm not practicing the religion that normally practices Lent, but it doesn't mean I cannot participate. In my opinion, it is good for every person to practice some self-control and also to see what we can live without since we live in a world of excess. Generally, it's something that anyone can do if they think it will benefit them.
This will be the first time that I've ever attempted a 40 day fast from anything and I really am excited to see what I can accomplish or discover about myself.
What is it that I'm going to give up you ask? This may not be a problem for some people, but seeing as how I grew up in a generation where my head is basically Siamese with a computer, I decided to give up social-networks. I'll be honest, I spend large chunks of time browsing the web and lol'ing at witty memes (I hope none of that made any sense), so now I need to find a better way to use this time. What I'm hoping for is that I'll use it for homework, studying, and exercising.
Unfortunately, this blog counts as a social network so it's going to have to hibernate with the others while I distance myself from the interweb and step into some sunlight (ahhhh, it burns!). Instead of writing down stories/thoughts about Lent and other things here, I'll be writing them down on my lappy or in my notebook, and later (using the magic copy/paste button) to put them on here. One thing I'll be diligent about is not trying to find loopholes. This is all or nothing guys.**
See you all in 40 days (not counting Sundays).
*This isn't all Lent is about, but it's one of the main things. There's a lot of fasting and special days. Go read up if you'd really like to know.
**I'm still going to be using e-mail since it's a necessity currently and it really isn't a social network anyways. Also, the internet isn't off limits, just things like Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, etc.
Saturday, February 11, 2012
Disregarding Dilemmas and Things I'll Never Understand
I've gotten to a point where there are a lot of things in my life that take some serious thinking time *(*Ryan sitting on his bed hitting himself with his fist saying, "Think, think, think!"*)
Am I going to do that? Nope, I'm going to take the typical person way out and ignore it until my problems manifest themselves as ulcers in my stomach.
What is Ryan going to do then? He's going to write about things that amuse/confuse him while eating cookie dough ice cream from the container, neglecting to shower, and talking to a cat.
What's that cat? You think I should keep eating the ice cream? I agree. Oh, you think I should get a spoon? No, it's not disgusting, I'm just being resourceful.
Who knew cats were so judgmental.
But to the main topic:
**THINGS RYAN WILL NOT UNDERSTAND FOR THE LIFE OF HIM
1.Those strange headbands girls wear that aren't hats but are normal headbands with a gland problem:
Doesn't she look so serene? I actually have no clue who this is as I pulled it from a Google image search (as I will with all the pictures I use here today) but it was basically the perfect example of what I mean. I'd have to say, I mostly don't understand this "accessory" because I don't like how they look.
More often than not, they are large, bulky, and give the wearer the appearance of an enlarged cranium. Is that what you want people to think, that you have head cancer? It's a headband...but it's not a hat. Please girls in Utah, stop this atrocity in the name of cold heads everywhere.
2.Sagging Yo' Pants
I know that this makes me sound as if I'm a crotchety old man waving his cane at the youngsters running across his lawn with their saggy butts, but I am. The only thing I can think of when I see unfortunate human beings such as these (this being an extreme example), is what will happen if they have to run? What if the popo comes a chasin' and their low riding trousers are their ultimate demise? Or the rocky theme song/chariots of fire comes on and the natural instinct to run possesses them? THEY'RE DOOMED.
I have seen this in mild cases around my campus and a person's underwear color is really just information that people should only ask for and is not usually a type of public art show. If you're dying to know my underwear color, I'll be happy to tell you. It's usually blue.
3. Chin Beards
Oh chortle chortle, look what I found, a joke to illustrate what I'm talking about. First off let me say I am not against people who lack a jaw-line or a chin. What I am against and do not understand is the use of a beard to create that illusion. If you could scroll down...
Here we have an example of the male chin beard. Lacking some bone structure, our adult male has taken his face hair and shaved and trimmed it into a line that will seemingly trick his coworkers. Let me tell you, Marsha in accounting didn't fall for it and neither am I.
I would just rather guys rock their head than grow abnormal facial hair. If I tried this I honestly wouldn't know where to stop and start in the shaving process. I'd end up with a line down part of my neck and then back up to my chin. I can see it now...sexy. If only I could actually grow normal facial hair. *sigh*
4.Old Woman/Man Water Aerobics
Can I first just say...her face...bless her. That is all.
Props to old people trying to keep their heart pumping so they have the strength to pull that 1929 caramel out of their pocket (it's been in there since 1959) and give it to you.
A handful of quizzical looks from me if you are a group of (usually) women who gather together with their foam dumbbells in the strange ritual that is water aerobics. From what I can tell, there is a lot of bobbing going on while the women chat along to 80's disco and slowly pump their dumbbells through the water making a quiet *swishing* noise. ***Typical conversation may include:
"Oh Barbara, did you see that last episode of Days of Our Lives?" *bob bob*
"Why yes I did Betty! Can you believe that Reginald's half sister was actually Robert's lover's ex-wife's fiance...'s twin?" *bob bob*
"It was such a twist, I had to call life-alert twice just to make sure I was still breathing!" *bob bob*
"Barbara you're such a kidder! Did you know who I saw at the market? Joan. She put pink tennis balls on her walker and was talking a mighty lot to the butcher." *bob bob*
"Well you know she always tries to get discounts from him that way, especially after Gerald ran off to join the circus." *bob bob*
"Right? That Joan--didn't even pitch in to make anything for the senior bake sale this year!" *bob bob*
"...Whore...and I wasn't kidding about the life-alert."
5.Farmville
I think that's all I need to say about that.
I you have anything that you don't understand, feel free to tell me since everyone has different opinions and, quoting a very hilarious 27bslash6.com,
"Opinions are like nipples, everybody has one. Some have firm points, others are barely discernible through layers, and some are displayed at every opportunity regardless of whether the audience has stated "I am interested in your nipples" or not.
What's that cat? You think I should stop licking the inside of the carton for the remains of the ice cream? That's just silly cat, this is the best part because then if I get the munchies later, I can just lick my face. You can too if you'd like. Ah, see that got your attention.
I always tell people if I'm not heard from for a week or two to just find my body before the cats start eating it...not a joke.
*I'm not serious about that part, I just enjoy Winnie the Pooh.
**This list contains things that I and just me, don't understand--not things that should society now must abide to by law. You can agree or disagree, this is all solely personal opinion so don't get your panties all in a bunch.
***If this doesn't secure my place in hell, I don't know what will. I enjoy my sense of humor at least.
Am I going to do that? Nope, I'm going to take the typical person way out and ignore it until my problems manifest themselves as ulcers in my stomach.
What is Ryan going to do then? He's going to write about things that amuse/confuse him while eating cookie dough ice cream from the container, neglecting to shower, and talking to a cat.
What's that cat? You think I should keep eating the ice cream? I agree. Oh, you think I should get a spoon? No, it's not disgusting, I'm just being resourceful.
Who knew cats were so judgmental.
But to the main topic:
**THINGS RYAN WILL NOT UNDERSTAND FOR THE LIFE OF HIM
1.Those strange headbands girls wear that aren't hats but are normal headbands with a gland problem:
Doesn't she look so serene? I actually have no clue who this is as I pulled it from a Google image search (as I will with all the pictures I use here today) but it was basically the perfect example of what I mean. I'd have to say, I mostly don't understand this "accessory" because I don't like how they look.
More often than not, they are large, bulky, and give the wearer the appearance of an enlarged cranium. Is that what you want people to think, that you have head cancer? It's a headband...but it's not a hat. Please girls in Utah, stop this atrocity in the name of cold heads everywhere.
2.Sagging Yo' Pants
I know that this makes me sound as if I'm a crotchety old man waving his cane at the youngsters running across his lawn with their saggy butts, but I am. The only thing I can think of when I see unfortunate human beings such as these (this being an extreme example), is what will happen if they have to run? What if the popo comes a chasin' and their low riding trousers are their ultimate demise? Or the rocky theme song/chariots of fire comes on and the natural instinct to run possesses them? THEY'RE DOOMED.
I have seen this in mild cases around my campus and a person's underwear color is really just information that people should only ask for and is not usually a type of public art show. If you're dying to know my underwear color, I'll be happy to tell you. It's usually blue.
3. Chin Beards
Oh chortle chortle, look what I found, a joke to illustrate what I'm talking about. First off let me say I am not against people who lack a jaw-line or a chin. What I am against and do not understand is the use of a beard to create that illusion. If you could scroll down...
Here we have an example of the male chin beard. Lacking some bone structure, our adult male has taken his face hair and shaved and trimmed it into a line that will seemingly trick his coworkers. Let me tell you, Marsha in accounting didn't fall for it and neither am I.
I would just rather guys rock their head than grow abnormal facial hair. If I tried this I honestly wouldn't know where to stop and start in the shaving process. I'd end up with a line down part of my neck and then back up to my chin. I can see it now...sexy. If only I could actually grow normal facial hair. *sigh*
4.Old Woman/Man Water Aerobics
Props to old people trying to keep their heart pumping so they have the strength to pull that 1929 caramel out of their pocket (it's been in there since 1959) and give it to you.
A handful of quizzical looks from me if you are a group of (usually) women who gather together with their foam dumbbells in the strange ritual that is water aerobics. From what I can tell, there is a lot of bobbing going on while the women chat along to 80's disco and slowly pump their dumbbells through the water making a quiet *swishing* noise. ***Typical conversation may include:
"Oh Barbara, did you see that last episode of Days of Our Lives?" *bob bob*
"Why yes I did Betty! Can you believe that Reginald's half sister was actually Robert's lover's ex-wife's fiance...'s twin?" *bob bob*
"It was such a twist, I had to call life-alert twice just to make sure I was still breathing!" *bob bob*
"Barbara you're such a kidder! Did you know who I saw at the market? Joan. She put pink tennis balls on her walker and was talking a mighty lot to the butcher." *bob bob*
"Well you know she always tries to get discounts from him that way, especially after Gerald ran off to join the circus." *bob bob*
"Right? That Joan--didn't even pitch in to make anything for the senior bake sale this year!" *bob bob*
"...Whore...and I wasn't kidding about the life-alert."
5.Farmville
I think that's all I need to say about that.
I you have anything that you don't understand, feel free to tell me since everyone has different opinions and, quoting a very hilarious 27bslash6.com,
"Opinions are like nipples, everybody has one. Some have firm points, others are barely discernible through layers, and some are displayed at every opportunity regardless of whether the audience has stated "I am interested in your nipples" or not.
What's that cat? You think I should stop licking the inside of the carton for the remains of the ice cream? That's just silly cat, this is the best part because then if I get the munchies later, I can just lick my face. You can too if you'd like. Ah, see that got your attention.
I always tell people if I'm not heard from for a week or two to just find my body before the cats start eating it...not a joke.
*I'm not serious about that part, I just enjoy Winnie the Pooh.
**This list contains things that I and just me, don't understand--not things that should society now must abide to by law. You can agree or disagree, this is all solely personal opinion so don't get your panties all in a bunch.
***If this doesn't secure my place in hell, I don't know what will. I enjoy my sense of humor at least.
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
An Education on Words
Due to requirements at the University I'm attending, I have to take a class called "University 1000." From what I've gathered from attending, the class is to teach us learning methods we can use in our lives and also basically how to normally function in society. I've decided to rename it to, "How To Not Be A Social Idiot and Other Things Most People Already Know Due to Common Sense...1000."
I bet you guys can see my take on the class.
So today, we all met in a single room to discuss the fine subject of words. More importantly, how to dissect a word of which we didn't know the definition and come up with a good guess to a definition. Not a terrible thing since there are a lot of words I don't know and sometimes practicing this helps.
An example: Bibliophile. Biblio: Books. Phile: Lover of. Thus, bibliophile wold be a lover of books. Such a beautiful relationship that probably isn't sanctioned by the state of Utah.
We then went through a list of words and circled those we knew and then buddied up with those around us to try and dissect and connect a meaning to the unknown words. Well, seeing as how the girl sitting 5 inches to my right took about .5 seconds to decide she would run to the girl 2 feet away, I was forced to ask if I could become class friends with the two giggling girls to my left. I'll name them green and ginger since one was wearing a green shirt and the other was a ginger. First mistake: attending class at all.
"Bibliophile..." said Ginger thoughtfully.
"Oh, someone who loves the bible!" said Green.
"Well isn't biblio books? So maybe a lover of books," I said
"I guess that makes sense," said Ginger "so essentric...essenteric?"
"Eccentric," I said.
"Oh, what's that?" said Green.
"Well it's like essential...so something like that," Said Ginger
"I thought essential was spelled with an s," I said.
*Ginger writes down essential*
"Yeah, he's right, it's an s, " Ginger laughs "So what now?"
"Well an eccentric is kind of like someone who is crazy about something, you know?" I suggest
*Green writes down crazy underneath eccentric*
"OK, pasedonym...." tries Green.
"Pseudonym," I say, hoping my brain doesn't explode.
Green sits and thinks a bit, "Isn't that a type of fighting?" She laughs.
I put my head down on the table...and that's how I died.
This continued on for many more words until class ended and only instilled in me great sadness. I often worry about what the public school system in Utah churns out each year since sometimes it lacks in a proper education so we'll see how I survive this class.
-Harold "hopefully maintains sanity and doesn't kill anyone while using a pseudoym" Parshegan.
aka Ryan
I bet you guys can see my take on the class.
So today, we all met in a single room to discuss the fine subject of words. More importantly, how to dissect a word of which we didn't know the definition and come up with a good guess to a definition. Not a terrible thing since there are a lot of words I don't know and sometimes practicing this helps.
An example: Bibliophile. Biblio: Books. Phile: Lover of. Thus, bibliophile wold be a lover of books. Such a beautiful relationship that probably isn't sanctioned by the state of Utah.
We then went through a list of words and circled those we knew and then buddied up with those around us to try and dissect and connect a meaning to the unknown words. Well, seeing as how the girl sitting 5 inches to my right took about .5 seconds to decide she would run to the girl 2 feet away, I was forced to ask if I could become class friends with the two giggling girls to my left. I'll name them green and ginger since one was wearing a green shirt and the other was a ginger. First mistake: attending class at all.
"Bibliophile..." said Ginger thoughtfully.
"Oh, someone who loves the bible!" said Green.
"Well isn't biblio books? So maybe a lover of books," I said
"I guess that makes sense," said Ginger "so essentric...essenteric?"
"Eccentric," I said.
"Oh, what's that?" said Green.
"Well it's like essential...so something like that," Said Ginger
"I thought essential was spelled with an s," I said.
*Ginger writes down essential*
"Yeah, he's right, it's an s, " Ginger laughs "So what now?"
"Well an eccentric is kind of like someone who is crazy about something, you know?" I suggest
*Green writes down crazy underneath eccentric*
"OK, pasedonym...." tries Green.
"Pseudonym," I say, hoping my brain doesn't explode.
Green sits and thinks a bit, "Isn't that a type of fighting?" She laughs.
I put my head down on the table...and that's how I died.
This continued on for many more words until class ended and only instilled in me great sadness. I often worry about what the public school system in Utah churns out each year since sometimes it lacks in a proper education so we'll see how I survive this class.
-Harold "hopefully maintains sanity and doesn't kill anyone while using a pseudoym" Parshegan.
aka Ryan
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Constructive Narcicism
For some reason today feels like a Saturday to me. I'm not exactly sure why. It could be because I had class in the morning and now I'm looking for things to do (you know, instead of homework) and so I thought I'd try and do some self reflecting.
I have recently snagged a new job (that I'll talk about later), but there is one thing about this job that is unavoidable. Self-consciousness. I'm not going to lie and say that I'm completely comfortable with my body all the time or that I think I'm a walking Adonis. Truth be told, I feel as if everyone at one point in their lives looks at themselves and thinks, "Hey, I wish that were just a little different..." I know that I have on occasion. Body image problems are something that run rampant in our culture. Whether a person is too tall, too short, too thin, too fat, has man-shoulders, huge pores, or has bad breath in the morning...ew,* we've all had that moment in the mirror.
Instead of moping and griping about what I wish was different about myself, I'm going to take a different route. At least to me, I think it's important for everyone once in awhile to sit down and tell themselves what they love about themselves. What makes them feel confident strutting down the street. The things that they've grown to love. It helps me focus on looking at the bright side and combating the cultural pressure placed upon us.
Here are some things (most of which I used to hate ) that I love about my body and myself:
My feet:
My creepy Gollum hands:
My height:
My lips:
My back:
My hair:
My glasses wearing face:
Throughout the years, I've come to embrace my body in a completely different way than I used to view myself as a student in the public school system. I've learned that every little thing about me makes myself who I am, whether I like it or not. My tastes change as does my body and I learn to appreciate its weird quirks and random markings (like that strange freckly birth-mark on my back).
I can always do what my Biology professor taught me last semester to remind us what amazing beings we are. Our bodies are doing amazing things all the time that we can't see and the things that we can see can be embraced instead of turned into self-loathing. An even better thing, we can find all the things we love in others.
I know that this does sound a little sappy, but I just need to remind myself right now how to be confident with my own body.
An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity.
-Martin Luther King Jr.
*Anyone get the reference? eh eh? Mean Girls, comes on
**This doesn't mean I have a foot fetish. I love my feet, not other peoples.
I have recently snagged a new job (that I'll talk about later), but there is one thing about this job that is unavoidable. Self-consciousness. I'm not going to lie and say that I'm completely comfortable with my body all the time or that I think I'm a walking Adonis. Truth be told, I feel as if everyone at one point in their lives looks at themselves and thinks, "Hey, I wish that were just a little different..." I know that I have on occasion. Body image problems are something that run rampant in our culture. Whether a person is too tall, too short, too thin, too fat, has man-shoulders, huge pores, or has bad breath in the morning...ew,* we've all had that moment in the mirror.
Instead of moping and griping about what I wish was different about myself, I'm going to take a different route. At least to me, I think it's important for everyone once in awhile to sit down and tell themselves what they love about themselves. What makes them feel confident strutting down the street. The things that they've grown to love. It helps me focus on looking at the bright side and combating the cultural pressure placed upon us.
Here are some things (most of which I used to hate ) that I love about my body and myself:
- In 7th grade, I despised my feet. They were ginormous clown feet glued to my little legs. Clomping down the halls of my Junior High, I wished I could have grown taller first, or that my feet weren't like small concrete blocks. The funny thing is about my feet's growth spurt though is that they they were the first to bloom. I told myself that they were different sizes for years, but realized now by trying on shoes from my teenage years that they haven't grown since 7th grade. Despite that my feet are larger than the average male, I've also realized in recent years that they aren't as large as a tall man's feet usually are. Usually people I meet that are my height have a size or two larger than me. Also, even though my feet are skinny and have long toes, my toes all go in the right direction. By this I mean that my big toe is the longest toe on my foot, and the others just follow suit like an AT&T commercial (is that the phone company?). I love that my feet don't have a strange arrangement of toe lengths and I love that my feet are perfectly sized for my body now that I've grown into them. I love my feet.**
My creepy Gollum hands:
- Now, I never knew if I had larger hands or not before I started playing the piano, so that's what I mostly blame my hands on. Being a 6'2 man, I feel that my hands are an appropriate size, but what used to bother me when I was younger was my skinny fingers. More than once I've heard my hands compared to Gollum, the fantasy creature from LOTR that had a ring fetish. They're long, bony, and skinny. To me, they remind me of an old man. Younger me I thought that I looked like I was wearing derranged oven mitts on my little forearms. The thing I have grown to love about them though is their dexterity which I attribute from years of piano playing. They learned to move quickly up and down rows of beautiful keys making music that I can interpret in a number of ways. It's almost a different language. My little skinny fingers can maneuver things that I don't think would be possible if they were larger. I can type the little buttons on my phone, twiddle knitting needles (my scarf was beautiful...ly hideous), and make magic with chopsticks. I love my hands.
My height:
- The first thing I always noticed about growing up was...growing up. I sprouted at a young age which made it easy to pick me out of a crowd (literally) and to stand above the rest (see what I did there?). I don't have to tell you that feeling different at a young age usually doesn't improve self-esteem. I didn't gain weight easily and ended up looking like a brown, mop-haired stick figure. Fortunately for me, I stopped growing eventually and this tall thing isn't so bad. If I want to, I can wear capri pants and get away with it, I can wear skinny jeans 'cause my legs just keep going, my body is stretched enough that I can keep a good waist size most of the time, and I can put things up where people can't eat them. I love being tall.
My lips:
- I just like them. Always have, always will.
My back:
- Thanks to learning to swim competitively in high school, I consider my back my best feature most of the time. I like that it's big and kind of stronger than my other muscles. I also love that it gives me better posture than I used to have--picture an Auschwitz victim...about accurate.
My hair:
- I've always been happy with my hair. It covers my head when I'm cold, it covers my head when I'm hot...it covers my head all the time. I've been able to grow it to a nice shag and chop it off when I feel like it. Once it turned orange from swimming too much and I still loved the hot mess that it was. A million times better than being bald.
- Possibly the thing I'm most grateful for is my teeth and smile. As fate would have it, no braces were ever put on my chompers and they stayed straight. They're always there at 2am when I'm downing oreos and stressing over a test or flashing themselves at people. I've even once had the wonderful compliment that I had a "James Franco" smile. What's better than a "James Franco" smile? Maybe a Ryan Gosling face, but I'll live with what I have and flash it everywhere.
My glasses wearing face:
- I'm not completely sure why, but I've always been able to wear the glasses I want. This is mostly from trusting my friends saying that I look good in the glasses I try on or wear, but it's something I've heard a lot so I'm going to put it down. Whether it's true or not doesn't matter. I like wearing glasses and I'm glad I can get away with it.
Throughout the years, I've come to embrace my body in a completely different way than I used to view myself as a student in the public school system. I've learned that every little thing about me makes myself who I am, whether I like it or not. My tastes change as does my body and I learn to appreciate its weird quirks and random markings (like that strange freckly birth-mark on my back).
I can always do what my Biology professor taught me last semester to remind us what amazing beings we are. Our bodies are doing amazing things all the time that we can't see and the things that we can see can be embraced instead of turned into self-loathing. An even better thing, we can find all the things we love in others.
I know that this does sound a little sappy, but I just need to remind myself right now how to be confident with my own body.
An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity.
-Martin Luther King Jr.
*Anyone get the reference? eh eh? Mean Girls, comes on
**This doesn't mean I have a foot fetish. I love my feet, not other peoples.
Thursday, January 12, 2012
What shall we name you?
First post of 2012! Woooot!
Can I just first mention how much of a Britney Spears mood I'm in right now. I'm a SLAAAAAAAAVE....for youuuuuu...
That's me belting Britney in my basement...my neighbors love me I bet, I'm giving them the gift of music. Merry late Christmas.
The semester has begun, oh what fun! You know how I talked about English last semester? Pretty sure that I'll be writing more about psych this time. Which leads me into the story of today...
It is the second day of psych class (more like the first since the first day you just talk about the syllabus and what you will do for the class), and we got into a discussion about paradigm mediated reality. Quick explanation about what that is. A paradigm is usually how we interpret the things about us so a paradigm mediated reality is how we view the world and other based on what we make up for ourselves. A terrible explanation but I think it kind of explains it. Considering it has little to do with my story, I'll let it go. You should too.
Point being, my professor put up a picture of a girl (from the late 80's/early 90's) and asked if there were any names we could give her.
"Sharon." I said
"Aaron?" said my professor
"Sharon"
"Ara?"
"No, Shaaaroon."
"Ok, Aaron"
*sigh*
"...Aaron?"
Final attempt, "SHARON."
"Oh, Sarah, ok."
Needless to say, this will be a fun class.
In all honesty, this is probably the class i'm the most excited for in terms of learning new things. Over the semester I get taught by 7 professors of the psychology department in what each of them specializes in. It helps that also most of the class is discussion and opinions on how we feel about things we read.
Here's to a good semester.
Quick note: I'm usually not a huge fan of New Years resolutions but someone told me that if you write them down it is a little more official. Some quick ones I would like to try and keep.
-Read a new book (non-school related) at least every two weeks. So far I have two books going at the same time.
-Not get below a B. The goal would of course be a 4.0 with all A's, but sometimes it just doesn't happen, ya know?
-Be able to run a consecutive 10 miles by the end of 2012. On my way with 3 miles of huffing and puffing.
-Alter all the coats/jackets I bought on my own. I will learn how...hopefully.
-Apply for a new job...more on that later.
-Swim at least 3 days a week with 1500 yards or more, 1200 or more for the first couple weeks. I'm out of shape ya'll.
I feel like those are good ones for now that start this year right. Let's see how it goes.
I'm a SLAAAAAAAAAVVVE......for yooooouuu.....
Can I just first mention how much of a Britney Spears mood I'm in right now. I'm a SLAAAAAAAAVE....for youuuuuu...
That's me belting Britney in my basement...my neighbors love me I bet, I'm giving them the gift of music. Merry late Christmas.
The semester has begun, oh what fun! You know how I talked about English last semester? Pretty sure that I'll be writing more about psych this time. Which leads me into the story of today...
It is the second day of psych class (more like the first since the first day you just talk about the syllabus and what you will do for the class), and we got into a discussion about paradigm mediated reality. Quick explanation about what that is. A paradigm is usually how we interpret the things about us so a paradigm mediated reality is how we view the world and other based on what we make up for ourselves. A terrible explanation but I think it kind of explains it. Considering it has little to do with my story, I'll let it go. You should too.
Point being, my professor put up a picture of a girl (from the late 80's/early 90's) and asked if there were any names we could give her.
"Sharon." I said
"Aaron?" said my professor
"Sharon"
"Ara?"
"No, Shaaaroon."
"Ok, Aaron"
*sigh*
"...Aaron?"
Final attempt, "SHARON."
"Oh, Sarah, ok."
Needless to say, this will be a fun class.
In all honesty, this is probably the class i'm the most excited for in terms of learning new things. Over the semester I get taught by 7 professors of the psychology department in what each of them specializes in. It helps that also most of the class is discussion and opinions on how we feel about things we read.
Here's to a good semester.
Quick note: I'm usually not a huge fan of New Years resolutions but someone told me that if you write them down it is a little more official. Some quick ones I would like to try and keep.
-Read a new book (non-school related) at least every two weeks. So far I have two books going at the same time.
-Not get below a B. The goal would of course be a 4.0 with all A's, but sometimes it just doesn't happen, ya know?
-Be able to run a consecutive 10 miles by the end of 2012. On my way with 3 miles of huffing and puffing.
-Alter all the coats/jackets I bought on my own. I will learn how...hopefully.
-Apply for a new job...more on that later.
-Swim at least 3 days a week with 1500 yards or more, 1200 or more for the first couple weeks. I'm out of shape ya'll.
I feel like those are good ones for now that start this year right. Let's see how it goes.
I'm a SLAAAAAAAAAVVVE......for yooooouuu.....
Thursday, December 29, 2011
Christmas with the Cardenas Clan
Despite the fact that Christmas has come and gone, I'm going to tell you a little about mine. Enjoy. Also, disclaimer, this is a little long so if you have things in the oven or on the stove, cat needing brushing, socks that need washing, go do that. I think you'll probably find it more satisfying anyways. What's better than warm socks?
That time of year has come and gone again where families around the world get together and celebrate the holiday of Christmas. Trees are decorated, houses are lit (with lights, not fire), and gifts are exchanged and promptly returned and exchanged for something else since you overheard that Susan wouldn't be caught dead in that tacky pink dress. But you thought it was a pretty dress you tell Susan.
"If anyone gave me that dress, I'd set it on fire in front of them and then I'd set that person on fire. So who'd you get for Secret Santa?"
Damn you Susan...
Anyways, I digress. One more thing that people usually gather around is the decoration of gingerbread houses. My family goes along with this tradition and decorates a gingerbread house, but somewhere a few years ago this tradition went a little off track and we added some of that Cardenas Flair. Now, I'm going to give you some examples of a traditional gingerbread house that I just pulled off a Google image search:
I think I heard some "Ahhhhh"s and some "Adorbs!" from a couple of you (you know who you are). These are cute little houses with fun decorations that just scream Christmas. Listen...CHRISTMAS! See? Normal house.
As I said before, the Cardenas gingerbread house took a turn for the different some years before. I can't recall the exact reason it changed, possibly due to modeling after some Calvin and Hobbes ideas, or just because we thought it would be fun, but either way, it is what it is.
Now when I show friends and others our gingerbread house, they respond appropriately with the "Ahhhhh"s and the "That's a cute hou--!" Then they start to look closer.
Here I present to you the Cardenas Gingerbread House of Horror with commentary:
Here we come to the front of the house where we happen upon a happy pirate/evil Communist genius. Communist due to the fact I watch too many old James Bond movies and he has a glowing green eye. Anywho, he is urging on the gummy bears to attack those poor marshmallow people who never had a chance. Then we added some holiday cheer by covering it in sugar sprinkles!
Here we have a marshmallow man trying to escape from the carnage that is going on behind him. Did he make it? We'll never know
Off to the left, we can see a happy marsh--oh wait, he's decapitated, there's his body.
In the back, we have our oblivious giant gingerbread man who is just taking it in. Poor guy. On the tree is also an angry pink guy, what he's doing there, I'm not sure. Maybe he's a bird.
Next is the back of our house, with a beautiful gingerbread man's head decorating the entryway. The decorator told us it would add more retail value to the house.
As we round the corner we find an alien chasing down some marshmallow men, one who appears to be laughing. I bet it's because he's the only one who got away.
Next is the roof. Up here we find the house decorated with brightly colored candy balls which add some nice texture to the house. Also, there's an alien with a leg in his mouth and a poor man who apparently fell to pieces.
Upon the chimney who do we find? Santa! Just kidding, it's another alien. Got you, didn't I? He has just recently gotten that gingerbread man who's leg is in the previous aliens mouth.
Looking underneath the awning of our house we find one man who had some sort of accident that left him blown to pieces up here *points to head*. I wonder where that ended up...
Oh there it is! Splattered all over the concrete and shingles! I do have to say that these deep ruby red does wonders for the color scheme of the house.
Moving on, we come to the train station next door. Why anyone would live right next door to a train station is beyond me. Maybe that's why the house was so cheap, if only they knew...
Our train has apparently just pulled straight out of hell and is being commandeered by an evil man with a mustache. If you have a curly mustache and a black hat, you're automatically evil, deal with it. A tribal head is placed perfectly in the center of the train creating a nice balance as it runs over a poor pink man who wasn't fast enough to step out of the way.
Or as I learned from drivers ed, he must have not looked before crossing train tracks. Silent killers those trains out of hell are.
Here is a larger picture of our hell-sent train. Leaning on it you can see a giant snowman who has so fashionably used a peppermint as a stylish belt. FABULOUS *hand flip*
Up on the top you can see the real conductor with a nice green hat. I would be that happy too if I got to drive the party train from hell.
If we come in a littler closer, here we find the result of some experiment: The gummy bear centipede. He enjoys long walks on the beach, sipping pinot grigio, cooking waffles at 5am, and discussing the benefits of drinking acai juice. He's also enjoys devouring gummy bears and adding them to himself. Hard to believe he's still single.
Being tugged along in the caboose of the train is a marshmallow dragon cow. Often thought to be a ferocious creature, the dragon cow is docile and grows his own bonsai trees. He puts hours of care into each one and has consecutively won the award of "Feng Shuist Tree on The Block" award for five years.
I'm just assuming that guy ate a lemon. Probably his eternal punishment for having a marshmallow hand.
And last, but certainly not least, we have our interracial confused snowman. I think this needs no other explanation than to look near his bottom.
So there you have it, a Cardenas family tradition. Like I've said before, we all have our family traditions. Mine just might be a bit stranger than yours, but that's what family is all about isn't it? A place where a bunch of weirdies can get together and even if they judge one another, they're still connect by genetics. If you're adopted, then I guess you're out of luck, you guys all get what I mean though.
A couple more things to add some holiday cheer to your day, Cardenas Quotes (not as many as last time, this is just from sheer memory):
"Get up or die!"
"Matt Damon is bald?! NOOO!"
"A homeless man thought I was David Archuletta so I sang for him so he'd go away."
"I just hate all people."
"Sooo, are we giving this away or can we just eat it?"
"Just say they're ethnic marshmallows."
"The children are restless. " (Christmas church 20 minutes in)
"That's an...interesting sweater."
That's all my mind is bringing up right now. Family, if you can think of any, feel free to add your input.
Hopefully we can all feel some holiday cheer this season and get together with our families, whatever that family consists of (around 35, mine will be a cat and Ben and Jerry's ice cream)
Happy Holidays! Merry Christmas!
That time of year has come and gone again where families around the world get together and celebrate the holiday of Christmas. Trees are decorated, houses are lit (with lights, not fire), and gifts are exchanged and promptly returned and exchanged for something else since you overheard that Susan wouldn't be caught dead in that tacky pink dress. But you thought it was a pretty dress you tell Susan.
"If anyone gave me that dress, I'd set it on fire in front of them and then I'd set that person on fire. So who'd you get for Secret Santa?"
Damn you Susan...
Anyways, I digress. One more thing that people usually gather around is the decoration of gingerbread houses. My family goes along with this tradition and decorates a gingerbread house, but somewhere a few years ago this tradition went a little off track and we added some of that Cardenas Flair. Now, I'm going to give you some examples of a traditional gingerbread house that I just pulled off a Google image search:
I think I heard some "Ahhhhh"s and some "Adorbs!" from a couple of you (you know who you are). These are cute little houses with fun decorations that just scream Christmas. Listen...CHRISTMAS! See? Normal house.
As I said before, the Cardenas gingerbread house took a turn for the different some years before. I can't recall the exact reason it changed, possibly due to modeling after some Calvin and Hobbes ideas, or just because we thought it would be fun, but either way, it is what it is.
Now when I show friends and others our gingerbread house, they respond appropriately with the "Ahhhhh"s and the "That's a cute hou--!" Then they start to look closer.
Here I present to you the Cardenas Gingerbread House of Horror with commentary:
Here we come to the front of the house where we happen upon a happy pirate/evil Communist genius. Communist due to the fact I watch too many old James Bond movies and he has a glowing green eye. Anywho, he is urging on the gummy bears to attack those poor marshmallow people who never had a chance. Then we added some holiday cheer by covering it in sugar sprinkles!
Off to the left, we can see a happy marsh--oh wait, he's decapitated, there's his body.
In the back, we have our oblivious giant gingerbread man who is just taking it in. Poor guy. On the tree is also an angry pink guy, what he's doing there, I'm not sure. Maybe he's a bird.
Next is the back of our house, with a beautiful gingerbread man's head decorating the entryway. The decorator told us it would add more retail value to the house.
As we round the corner we find an alien chasing down some marshmallow men, one who appears to be laughing. I bet it's because he's the only one who got away.
Next is the roof. Up here we find the house decorated with brightly colored candy balls which add some nice texture to the house. Also, there's an alien with a leg in his mouth and a poor man who apparently fell to pieces.
Upon the chimney who do we find? Santa! Just kidding, it's another alien. Got you, didn't I? He has just recently gotten that gingerbread man who's leg is in the previous aliens mouth.
Looking underneath the awning of our house we find one man who had some sort of accident that left him blown to pieces up here *points to head*. I wonder where that ended up...
Oh there it is! Splattered all over the concrete and shingles! I do have to say that these deep ruby red does wonders for the color scheme of the house.
Moving on, we come to the train station next door. Why anyone would live right next door to a train station is beyond me. Maybe that's why the house was so cheap, if only they knew...
Our train has apparently just pulled straight out of hell and is being commandeered by an evil man with a mustache. If you have a curly mustache and a black hat, you're automatically evil, deal with it. A tribal head is placed perfectly in the center of the train creating a nice balance as it runs over a poor pink man who wasn't fast enough to step out of the way.
Or as I learned from drivers ed, he must have not looked before crossing train tracks. Silent killers those trains out of hell are.
Here is a larger picture of our hell-sent train. Leaning on it you can see a giant snowman who has so fashionably used a peppermint as a stylish belt. FABULOUS *hand flip*
Up on the top you can see the real conductor with a nice green hat. I would be that happy too if I got to drive the party train from hell.
If we come in a littler closer, here we find the result of some experiment: The gummy bear centipede. He enjoys long walks on the beach, sipping pinot grigio, cooking waffles at 5am, and discussing the benefits of drinking acai juice. He's also enjoys devouring gummy bears and adding them to himself. Hard to believe he's still single.
Being tugged along in the caboose of the train is a marshmallow dragon cow. Often thought to be a ferocious creature, the dragon cow is docile and grows his own bonsai trees. He puts hours of care into each one and has consecutively won the award of "Feng Shuist Tree on The Block" award for five years.
I'm just assuming that guy ate a lemon. Probably his eternal punishment for having a marshmallow hand.
And last, but certainly not least, we have our interracial confused snowman. I think this needs no other explanation than to look near his bottom.
So there you have it, a Cardenas family tradition. Like I've said before, we all have our family traditions. Mine just might be a bit stranger than yours, but that's what family is all about isn't it? A place where a bunch of weirdies can get together and even if they judge one another, they're still connect by genetics. If you're adopted, then I guess you're out of luck, you guys all get what I mean though.
A couple more things to add some holiday cheer to your day, Cardenas Quotes (not as many as last time, this is just from sheer memory):
"Get up or die!"
"Matt Damon is bald?! NOOO!"
"A homeless man thought I was David Archuletta so I sang for him so he'd go away."
"I just hate all people."
"Sooo, are we giving this away or can we just eat it?"
"Just say they're ethnic marshmallows."
"The children are restless. " (Christmas church 20 minutes in)
"That's an...interesting sweater."
That's all my mind is bringing up right now. Family, if you can think of any, feel free to add your input.
Hopefully we can all feel some holiday cheer this season and get together with our families, whatever that family consists of (around 35, mine will be a cat and Ben and Jerry's ice cream)
Happy Holidays! Merry Christmas!
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